In their own way, illegal Irish are among the most arrogant and demanding of foreigners who have inserted themselves into America. They believe Ireland’s history of exporting its excess population gives them some special rights not available to other illegal aliens. As English speaking people from Europe, Irish are more culturally similar to us than many other groups, but that background gives them NO right to violate American immigration laws.

The most recent ploy of the Irish Lobby for Immigration Reform is to engage in the sort of squishy redefinition of words we’ve come to expect from anti-border extremists: ILIR seeks legality, not amnesty, for undocumented Irish (Irish Echo, April 23, 2008).

This issue appears to be more pressing now. The Economist recently warned that the weakening Irish property market could topple the country’s economy because of Ireland’s dependence on construction-related revenue. Unemployment in the Republic is higher than it has been in a decade, while the first quarter’s increase in unemployment was the worst since 1975. Thousands of construction jobs are also at risk in the North because of the downturn in building activity.

This is all the more reason to seek a legal pathway for Irish immigration. From the very beginning, the ILIR aligned ourselves with the Kennedy/McCain bill, which sought to create a conditional path to legal status for all undocumented immigrants. Kennedy/McCain did not promote amnesty, and neither did we. We have never sought amnesty for the undocumented Irish. We sought legality.

The idea that America should award “legality” (or whatever the verbal fiction du jour is) to illegal Irish because of hiccups in Ireland’s economy is total tomfoolery.

Ireland is now a major immigrant-receiving country (particularly from Eastern Europe — leading to a multicultural Dublin) and if there are not enough jobs for Irish, then the Irish immigration pests should petition Ireland to take better care of its own. We have more than enough unwanted foreigners here in America already.

In fact, Ireland is so prosperous that its neighborhood bars are closing — a curious concept, but that’s what the Washington Post says: In Affluent New Ireland, Rural Pubs Are So Yesterday. Obviously, illegal Irish should get on home to straighten out their confused brethren.

ohn McCain spent the week campaigning in poor black neighborhoods. Is this part of some complex master Rovian plan to switch the demographic balance of the election? Nah. Or is it part of a cynical “Message: I Care” ploy? Nah, too. Or does McCain really care about poor blacks? Nah, three.

McCain’s pretty much broke, so he’s running a Reality TV-style campaign where instead of paying for expensive speechwriters and TV ads, he just figures out some wacky situation that will attract more cameras than normal and he just wings it in from there. This week’s McCain campaign jaunt was like that Paris Hilton reality show “The Simple Life” where she and Nicole Richie milked cows.

McCain’s been winging it his whole life. That’s what he’s best at. He may lose a wing now and then, but he’s still here.

In contrast, Obama’s preferred mode of campaigning is the way Daniel Day-Lewis makes movies: as infrequently and monumentally as possible. Obama’s 5000 word speech on Rev. Wright was the political equivalent of Daniel Day-Lewis’s performance in “There Will Be Blood.”

In fact, what a lot of people said to each other right after Obama’s Rev. Wright speech was awfully similar to what they said as they were walking up the theater aisle from “There Will Be Blood,” with Brahms’ Violin Concerto blasting away behind them:

“Magnificent!”

“He makes a shiver run down my leg!”

“Like Orson Welles’ ‘Citizen Kane!’ / Lincoln’s ‘Gettysburg Address!’”

“He’s so much better than all other actors / politicians!”

“By the way” [in a small voice, looking around to make sure nobody else in the crowd is paying attention], what the hell was that about?“

“Uh … I dunno.”

“You don’t know either?

“Well, it was about this minister.”

“But what about the minister?”

“Yeah, well, Day-Lewis / Obama hates / loves the minister. And he gets rid of / doesn’t get rid of the minister.”

“How come?”

“I … don’t know. It had something to do with religion. But, it didn’t seem to come up much in the movie / speech.”

“So, why are we raving about it?”

“Look, making sense isn’t really the point, now is it? The point is that Daniel Day-Lewis / Barack Obama is the most amazing person in the whole world.”

“Right, sorry, my mistake, never mind.”